Things that make ya go hmmmm....

I love flying Southwest Airlines! Besides the fact they don't charge for luggage (yay!) their flight announcements can be hilarious, depending on who's doing the announcing.

Here are a few we heard on our recent trip:

Heard after the final call to turn off all personal electronic items before takeoff: "Please turn off all cell phones at this time. If you love 'em, tell 'em. If you don't, just hang up."

Spoken by our pilot, during our layover in Boise: "Anyone here have a map to Portland? We've seemed to misplaced ours. Anyone? Anyone? Oh well, I guess we'll get another one sent to us."

Spoken during the safety lesson before takeoff: "...four oxygen masks will be deployed. After you've finished screaming, place the mask over your face and adjust the elastic band at the back. If you're traveling with small children or those needing assistance, adjust your own mask first, then your child's. If you're traveling with two children, well (short pause here)...pick your favorite or the one with the most potential."

"Smoking is not allowed anywhere on this flight. If you smokers really need one more cigarette, please step out on the wing to do so. Our in-flight movie will be 'Gone With The Wind'."

"The captain had lit the safety belt sign. Please remain in your seat with your safety belt locked low around your hips. If you wonder why the flight attendants can be up and walking around, it's because they have velcro on the bottom of their shoes."

"In the unlikely event our flight becomes the Love Boat, flotation vests are stowed below your seat..."